The Top 14 Upcoming David Blaine Stunts

14> Spending 50 days at a psychiatrist’s office and having himself declared officially insane.

13> Remaining in suspended animation until Ben and J.Lo are married, either to each other or someone else.

12> Finding a few non-journalists who actually give a damn.

11> Attempting to set a new record for bitch-slapping Donald Trump.

10> Spending a week in a room full of cameras without seeking publicity.

9> Free-diving the depths of his own narcissism.

8> Attempting to live for six weeks eating nothing but tidbits combed from the beards of the ZZ Top guys.

7> Getting laid without resorting to magic.

6> Surviving three weeks nestled in Elizabeth Taylor’s cleavage.

5> Pulling his head completely out of his ass.

4> Going trick-or-treating in Harlem while dressed as a pointy-headed ghost.

3> Attempting to free-climb Anna Nicole Smith.

2> Holding his breath until his 15 minutes are up.

1> Flying solo, non-stop around the world, suspended from his inflated ego.

[ The Top 5 List ]

[ Copyright 2003 by Chris White ]