Her Majesty the Queen was being shown around the London Memorial Hospital. As she was being given the guided tour by a senior consultant, they passed a room where you could see a man masturbating wildly through the window.
Of course the Queen was not at all amused and demanded an explanation as to why these activities were allowed in the hospital.
“Ah,” said the doctor. “It is unfortunate that you had to witness that, but the poor patient is suffering from a very debilitating condition. He produces so much semen that unless he gets rid of it 4 times a day, his testicles will explode.”
“Oh,” said her Majesty. “Well, in that case I suppose it’s understandable that he must do that.”
A little further on down the corridor, they passed another room. The door was open and through it you could see a very pretty nurse who was clearly giving a patient oral intimate relationship.
“Goodness gracious!” shrieked Her Majesty. “I demand an explanation for this kind of sordid behavior.”
“Ah,” said the Doctor. “Same problem, but he has a better health plan.”