A game of animal football

The animals were bored. Finally, the lion had an idea. “I know a really
exciting game that the humans play called football. I’ve seen it on T.V.”

He proceeded to describe it to the rest of the animals and they all got
excited about it so they decided to play. They went out to the field and chose
up teams and were ready to begin.

The lion’s team received. They were able to get two first downs and then had
to punt. The mule punted and the rhino was back deep for the kick. He caught the
ball, lowered his head and charged. First, he crushed a roadrunner, then two
rabbits. He gored a wildebeast, knocked over two cows, and broke through to
daylight, scoring six.

Unfortunately, they lacked a placekicker, and the score remained 6 – 0.

Late in the first half the lion’s team scored a touchdown and the mule kicked
the extra point. The lion’s team led at halftime 7 – 6. In the locker room, the
lion gave a peptalk.

“Look you guys. We can win this game. We’ve got the lead and they only have
one real threat. We’ve got to keep the ball away from the rhino, he’s a killer.
Mule, when you kick off be sure to keep it away from the rhino.”

The second half began. Just as the mule was about to kick off, the rhino’s
team changed formation and the ball went directly to the rhino. Once again, the
rhino lowered his head and was off running. First, he stomped two gazelles. He
skewered a zebra, and bulldozed an elephant out of the way. It looked like he
was home free. Suddenly at the twenty-yard line, he dropped over dead. There
were no other animals in sight anywhere near him. The lion went over to see what
had happened. Right next to the dead rhino he saw a small centipede.

“Did you do this?” he asked the centipede.

“Yeah, I did.” the centipede replied.

The lion retorted, “Where were you during the first half?”

“I was putting on my shoes.”