The Top 17 Headlines in Animal Newspapers (Part I)

17> Store Finally Sets Price on Window Doggie

16> Salamander Planned Parenthood: “No Newts Is Good Newts!”

15> Hindenburg Crashes: “Oh, the Pigeonity!”

14> Administration Unable to Locate Bones Allegedly Buried in Terrier’s Yard

13> Missing Ant Colony Found in Pants

12> Survey: Let Timmy Get His Own Ass Out of Well

11> New Study Links Leg-Humping to Being Put Outside

10> Widow Devours Husband in Poisonous Web of Deceit

9> Weekly Outbreaks of Bird-on-Bird Violence Continue as Eagles Beat Ravens and Falcons Pummel Seahawks

8> President Bonzo Accuses Rivals of Poo-Flinging Campaign

7> Mr. Ed to Be Next Mare? Voters Say Neigh!

6> Study: Desire for Pussy Causes Late-Night Howling

5> Bitch Leaves Newborns Behind Dumpster

4> Johnnie Cockapoo Tells Montecore Jury: “For Biting the Twit, You Can’t Convict!”

3> Canine Honeymoon Dampened by Garden Hose

2> Hamster Offers Details of Spinning “Torture Chamber”

1> Huey, Louie, Dewey Defeat Truman

[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]
[ Copyright 2004 by Chris White ]